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BDSM Slave Training: 

Long Distance Submissive Training


If you are unable to connect with a partner in your local city for some submissive training, it may become necessary to find a Dom/me or submissive over the internet – though you may never meet in person or simply not that often.  The question of whether long distance training is possible or even effective is the next logical thought.


What you might want to realize is that Dominance and submission are not something that simply goes on in a dungeon.  Those that believe this will have more troubles in training new slaves, even when the slave is sitting right in front of them.  Changing your perception of what creates power exchanges is the first issue at hand.


But after that, long distance training is still a very challenging prospect for any Dom/me – whether experienced or new to the scene.  This kind of training requires clear intentions and regulations as well as constant contact and supervision in order to make the relationship satisfactory to both sides of the situation.  In a long distance relationship, you need to be able to trust each other to contribute to the process without any major problems.


The slave and Master (or Mistress) must commit to a relationship of a power exchange, but it needs to be something that is spelled out clearly from the beginning.  Using a contract or a list of expectations for both sides will need to be created from the beginning, agreed upon, and then followed explicitly.  Any deviation from the contract can lead to troubles in long distance training.


The good news is that the invention of the internet has allowed these kinds of relationships many possibilities in terms of creating culpability for the slave's actions.  Not only can the slave be on the internet via IMs and chat rooms in real time, but they can also be controlled via the phone and emails.  By sending digital pictures and notes, the slave can show that certain tasks are completed and then the Master can determine if the slave has done as they have ordered.


This constant communication is a great form of control for the Dom/me and the slave in long distance training, but it does need to be consistent in order to work.  Setting up certain times for communication will help to expedite this process, but so will certain tasks that need to be done every day at certain times or on certain days.  This communication can also include code words or certain ways that the communication should occur in order to further create a D/s relationship.


The biggest concern with a long distance relationship is whether or not it will falter because of the distance component.  But a Dom/me that is willing to check up on the slave and a slave that is good about completing the tasks will create a relationship that works well.  In truth, both sides need the constant attention too.  If the Dom/me doesn't get feedback and responses from the slave, they cannot tell if their orders are working, but if the slave doesn't get feedback from the Dom/me, they cannot tell if they are a priority in the Dom/me's life.


Long distance training can work if both sides are willing to give their full attention to the situation and the agreements.  Of course, this online BDSM can turn into the real thing when the slave and Dom/me are finally able to meet once in a while – and that's when the real test of the effectiveness of the training begins.




Keep your eyes peeled for the next edition which will arrive in a couple of days!

In the mean time, take a moment to read about how The BDSM Slave Training Guide can teach you more effective strategies to improve your long distance bdsm training (using our step-by-step instructional manual, pictures, and diagrams). Learn more about Submissive Training and discover an intensity like never before!


Mistress Sophia 

Head Instructor -

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